Watching an angry Aussie incapable of using punctuation obliterate a box must be one hell of a sight. Fortunately, a few that witnessed it managed to survive with their lives... more or less.
Yahtzee, famous for his gaming parody Zero Punctuation, received a package today from EA Games promoting Dante's Inferno. Yahtzee eagerly pulled open the wooden box, noticing that the inside of the lid read, "The Fifth Circle of Hell Is Close." The Escapist said, "Members of The Escapist staff crowded around the box, eager to find out what was inside. We were somewhat bemused to discover nothing but a small burlap bundle containing safety goggles and a ball peen hammer."
That's when it happened.
"Never Gonna Give You Up..."
Susan Arendt from The Escapist said, "We all got a good chuckle as we realized that EA had just managed to Rickroll Yahtzee through the mail, but our laughter quickly died out when we discovered that closing the box didn't shut off the song. Yahtzee looked at us, then at the box, then at the hammer in his hand.
And then he got to work." What ensued must have been a horrific (or hilarious) sight, for Yahtzee, that taunting Aussie we all know and love, tore the box a new one, likely imagining how he would get his vengeance. He strapped on the supplied safety goggles and brought the banhammer down on Rick Astley's defensive mechanisms, "three layers of wood, bones, and insects." After tearing through the upper layers, Yahtzee found a soundbox equipped with batteries. Being the smart gamer he is, he targeted the batteries and ripped them out, only to reveal a small scroll tucked away: "The sin of wrath is yours. You have succumbed to anger and opened an infernal spring that seethes with dark waters. Quelled not, your anger begot rage. The waters have risen unchecked and ye will be drowned in stinking mire. Go to Hell." Can't wait to see the Dante review now.